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Thursday, 4 October 2012

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Congress announced its future course of action - Sriprakash Jaiswal will be dumped in a coal mine


Congress High Command plans to clean Party's image

After embarrassed by a very low level of humour than any tad low life Congress leader like Digvijay Singh, the High Command decided to take Sriprakash Jaiswal and dump him into coal mine and then appoint him as a mine worker so that whatever embarrassment that he created for the party would get cleaned.

According to sources, Congress High Command is very serious on taking this decision to impress Madam Sonia Gandhi and show Indian voters that it can punish the people with not just sensible humor but also weird humor. Last time, the party missed such a chance with Home Minister Sushil Kumar Shinde and this time the leaders said that they don't want to miss the opportunity.

"Yes, actually Madamji is fed up of these immature, ugly and nonsense leaders," said Salman Khurshid, India's Law Minister.

He said "We are seriously thinking of taking him with his oldest wife and ask her to dig a big hole in the mine filed with coal and put him from head to toe in that mine. Make him totally black as like Caribbean guy and then ask miner to put him as a coal mine labour."

Sources said that the party faced a lot of ire from Indians on the issue of putting comedians, cartoonists and satirists in jail and made its image bad. However, but the party is now in a reforming trajectory and wants to clean its image. Therefore, President Sonia Gandhi ordered her colleagues in the High Command to sort this matters as soon as possible and find the possibilities to stricter action against such immature and stup*d leaders.

"Madamji made a detailed inquiry of how many wives Sriprakash has and why he is not interested in his old wives," said Kapil Sibal.

He said "She appointed a full time panel under Home Minister Sushil Kumar Shinde to find out exact count of Jaiswal's wives. We expect we will get the report by next week and future action will be taken."

When India Satire Correspondent reached Sriprakash Jaiswal, first he scratched his butt and then head and gave a weird nervous look. Finally he said "No issues, whatever Madamji decides it is our responsibility to follow it. However, coal mine is quite interesting stuff. It is very costly and these days prices are rising sharply."

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