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Thursday, 21 June 2012

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Indian dogs to rally against gutka spitters for encroachment of their places earlier used for their natural activities

Meanwhile, government decided to promote colourful Indian roads internationally to attract more foreign tourists
Indian dogs announced a rally against all the gutka spitters, protesting over the encroachment of their legitimate places which were earlier used for peeing are now spitted by gutka. These places include corners of trees, pillars and walls.
"We have to pee somewhere and corners are the real place bhow waaouww," said Moti Dog, President of All India Dogs Association (AIDA) "We all want to use corners of the pillars and trees also few platforms for peeing which is our legitimate demand. However, with ever rising population of gutka spitters who have same habits like we have, to spit wherever a corner found created a serious havoc like situation for us. Uhhhuuuuuuu."
Study said that rising encroachment from the gutka spitters in India has created serious health related issues for Indian dogs. While dogs required minimum level of hygiene and cleanliness while completing their natural activity, they are not really willing to do it in the places where gutka spitters already spitted.
Some parts of pillars which earlier were used by dogs
"That red colour sucks our asses. We hate that smell and stain. It is also harmful for our health. Bhooo bhoo," said a pet dog from a Worli Sea Facing building to India Satire correspondent, with a condition of anonymity.
He said "We just feel vomiting when we see that thing and how these Indians can tolerate such nonsense. At least they could have found any other place to use their tongue in much proper way. This is damn ridiculous. Wow waaw."
Dogs lobby demanded a reservation of 30% corners of streets, pillars, platforms and trees where no human being will vomit his gutka and thereby these places will remain a bit clean and hygienic.
Few aggressive dogs, however, are not in favor of peaceful protests.
"Only two tigers can stay in a jungle. Bhoo bhoo," said Tiger dog, "Either we all dogs will use corners of these places or these gutka spitters. They can't have our habits, so come, fight with us directly and decide whether we shall pee on those pillars or they will spit. Uhuuuuuuu."
However, meanwhile the government decided to promote the colourful Indian roads painted by daily gutka street kings across the international markets, to attract weirdness and strangeness searching foreign tourists.
"Yes, actually asking everybody to stay hygiene and clean is kind of hitting out on a stone which doesn't even move a fraction. These are so careless people that in spite of putting fine of Rs 500 they don't stop spitting. So finally we decided that if this is unique thing of India then why not promote it. At least few nasty and weird foreign tourists will come to India to watch these roads," said Subodh Kant Sahay, Tourism Minister of India.
Red design to attract foreign tourists
He said "India is becoming more and more popular for its gutka spitters. However, many foreigners don't know that we have red colour roads which itself is a unique thing. It will also bring a huge amount of foreign investment for India."
Sahay also told that in India many bus, train and even on airport platforms, corners of pillars and trees are full of red colours and different designs.
Government sources said that the campaigning would start after the monsoon completes. The ministry also plans to talk to get all the sites as World Heritage grade so that few sensible tourists will also visit India.
However, few sources said that there are many other uses of gutka spitters too.
A source on condition with anonymity said "Actually, few suggestions came like if gutka spitters are so courageous that they don't fear the law then why don't we send them on border so that at least this courage will help India to improve its security." 
No fear of law, courageous human beings

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