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Monday, 9 July 2012

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Indian gents opposed FDI in retail; they said close existing super markets

Gents generally don't unite, but this time its wrong and they are protesting against super markets
Gents feel stupid following wife in the super markets, FDI in retail add to their woes
Sources said that All India Gents Lobby (AIGL) is lobbying against FDI in retail which government is pursuing these days and asked government to shut down the existing super market chains, as those make them look idiots following their wives at the time of shopping.

The survey conducted by AIGL said that all the gents in India unanimously agreed that they don't want to look more idiots while shopping with their wives and therefore they opposed government's initiative of FDI in retail.
"It looks so stupid yaar. My son shows me that I am driving a car and not trolley and makes irritating sounds like zurrrrrrrr zurrrrrrrr... just kind of voice my son makes while walking with me. My wife looks all the things very seriously as she is going to make some intelligent decision and every here and there. I have to ask her every time, Darling should I take this or should I take this. Everything makes me so funny and stupid that I started finding out reasons to avoid this weekend shopping. But now if FDI in retail allowed and if foreign biggy retail shops come to India my life will become hell," said Rajesh Oberoi, a Mumbai-base victim of the super market shopping with his wife.
Mr and Ms Sinha are in an intense shopping spree
A survey made by AIGL said that 99% of the husbands feel they are like the wives and their wives become their husbands. The survey also suggested that husbands victimized of super market shopping feels difficulties while taking rational decisions and low self esteem.
"Dude, I just can't tell you about that nightmarish life. Just a one year back while watching my wife's face when she was shopping in a super market (name withheld) I started feeling like its a difficult job to select products which I can't do in my entire life. She used to say I am a trash buyer and wasting money easily. But now I am happy I am divorcee," said Rajiv Sinha, a Delhi based IT professional.
Another survey from an independent agency said that most of the Indians don't want existing super market themselves before even FDI in retail decision to take under consideration.
"Fuck! Normal super market is hell, forget foreign retail shops here," said Suresh Manchanda, an Investment Banker based in Mumbai.
He said "Best would be listening to small grocery shops plea. They are more convenient and our involvement is least. If foreign big players arrive here we can't roam in 3-4 km circle."
AIGL president C Ramanujan said that many gents from middle class to higher middle class have registered complaints of a torture they are facing with super market retail shopping. He also told that many gents have started feeling low self esteem.
Shriram Handa, a newly married husband said "Yesterday I asked my wife that darling shall we buy Kellogs Chocos. Do you know what she said? She told me no bachcha I should not eat sugary Chocos but just dalia is fine for me. So much of harassment, I face. I can't take whatever I want to buy and just I am used as a trolley driver in the entire shop." 
While ladies association has yet to respond to India Satire correspondent, the government responded with a letter that it ignores plea of majority of population therefore adding to woes of gents.

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