SPECIAL GUEST COLUMN - POLITICS
People like Digvijay Singh are hard to find – Albert Einstein
Since I invented so many theories, I hardly have seen any kind of person who matches the talent that Digvijay Singh (Diggy) has. Opposition and few idiot satirists might say anything about him, but my genuine opinion is that he is highly innovative, focused and creative mind with trouble shooting and debugging qualities that any kind of Microsoft PC has.
Recently, I went through news that Diggy received driving license on the holiday. While considering many points, this must be a benchmark event in the history of India. However, without any reason opposition party cried foul.
According to my theory of the photoelectric effect, electrons are emitted from matter (metals and non-metallic solids, liquids or gases) as a consequence of their absorption of energy from electromagnetic radiation of very short wavelength, such as visible or ultraviolet radiation. Diggy is best example of the theory, so many solids and so many liquids he absorbed and became a real electromagnetic radiation creating a near 100% level solution to any crap problem.
Now, if we just put the theory in the light of current event while electrons emitted out of a matter called Diggy generally attracts RTO guys which have no habit to work on Sundays or any kind of packed government holiday schedule. In spite of all these things, the electrons let them force work on Sunday to just watch whether Diggy can still drive a Luna or not. Few other dominos can be witnessed. While they carefully watch whether his Luna driving skills are still intact or not, they also save many dogs and cats on the street from a probable situation of Diggy's Luna on their tail, head or a leg.
BJP, which has unnatural electrons, just ridiculously slapped Diggy while ignoring his way of thinking which led the totally sloppy profession to work, even on holiday.
However, theory of special relativity doesn't apply here. While many RTO people were enthusiastic to impress Diggy who may become Chief Minister of Madhya Pradesh, as a future investment, others were just yawning there is no absolute and well-defined state of rest. Both the arguments make sure that theory of special relativity which is generalisation of Galileo's principle of relativity—that all uniform motion is relative hardly applies on Diggy making him a special case.
My opinion is clear, I appreciate Diggy's stand that every government department should work day night which I really equates to my formula of mass-energy equivalence or E = mc2, where c is the speed of light in a vacuum that tarnish sleeps of even government servants.
(Story reported by our special correspondent Jhyap)
