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Monday, 1 August 2011

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“Lokpal Bill is not Jokepal Bill,” confirmed Sibal Uncle

"No… no it's not a Jokepal Bill, it's Lokpal Bill only. I think there is some typo," inventor of Zero Loss Theory, India's best lawyer, Kapil Sibal (Sibal Uncle) sincerely said.

He said "the government has shown serious efforts to formulating Lokpal Bill (popularly known as Jokepal Bill)
and listed out a slew of salient features of the Bill and stressed that it was a very effective Bill and a first (?) in the history of democratic India and not a joke at all. A first in the history of democratic India, and still it is not a joke, interesting.

In an open discussion on a TV show (with harmless questions), Sibal Uncle projected the Lokpal Bill in a very good light and listed out its myriad features which have been introduced "for the first time in India's history (however, he conveniently ignored that who told him to introduce bill)."

On being asked to react on Anna Hazare's vehement rejection of the bill and his oft quoted tag of "Jokepal" instead of Lokpal, Sibal started by saying that "It is for the first time in India's history that all the ministers are under its purview (he didn't maintain why earlier Congress government, forget 20 years back but the same Congress government 2-3 years back didn't introduce). For the first time in India's history, a separate prosecution wing with no link to the government will be under Lokpal's ambit (with no powers… ha ha ha). An investigation wing, for the first time in India's history, will come under its jurisdiction (same thing, with no powers). Any sanction will not be needed, again, for the first time in India's history, for the prosecution of any minister (great, but its minister only and not prime minister)."

"If you put the PM's office under its purview, there will be allegations against him on a daily basis (ha ha ha, why would anybody alleged PM every day. Does Indian public have so much time to do all these things?), given the sort of politics that prevails here (this means he is really worried about the current situation of Manuji who is facing accusation from Raja kind of people). In such a situation, will the country be governed properly, ever?" said Sibal. DCFC reporter asked a Congress Spokesperson "does Manuji function government properly now?" However, he said "this is a public forum and Uncle should be asked with harmless questions. The questions are already decided and Uncle has done his homework by mugging up the answers to those questions. So please get lost out of here with your sarcastic and funny questions. Uncle is already irritated with DCFC."

On being asked if there was no corruption in the Judiciary, and why should it not come under Lokpal's ambit, Sibal Uncle said that many towering names in the Judiciary were of the view that it should not be kept in Lokpal's purview.

"The likes of GS Varma and MN Venkatachaliah, who have been former Chief Justices of India, have said that the Judiciary should be out of the purview of Lokpal," said Sibal Uncle.

"We are bringing a separate Judicial Accountability Bill, which is stronger and the whole Judiciary will be under its jurisdiction," asserted Sibal Uncle. However, he didn't maintain time line (Lokpal Bill took almost 50 years to come in front of Parliament) and how speedily it will do justice.

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